You can go down the list of cursed blame and find Lady Luck, Fate, Karma and a random God all together. All “religions” seem to be joint when it comes to pin-pointing reasons for failure, problems or whatever.
When everything is going fantastically, we all tend to feel similarly, as in “it’s about time.” If we even notice. Society as a whole has gotten to a point where it feels it’s seen it all, done it all, bought the book and watched the movie. For some reason, this jaded mentality has corroded our ability to congratulate someone earnestly when they’ve accomplished something. We revel in the negative statements and bitchy epithets allowed by the enormous “eLife” offered by the Internet. In bringing these large groups of people together from all over the World we’re in a place that really allows us to learn and grow from each other. Instead of grabbing that opportunity, we’re wasting our precious lives groaning and moaning about things we probably could care less about. Social Media has allowed the inner gremlins to come out and shake angry fists at anthills, ignoring the beautiful luscious forests filling the mountain tops in the distance. I honestly am upset when someone is having a hard time or needs the comfort of friends. Reaching out is never something to be taken lightly. It’s hard enough for a person to admit they even need help in the first place.
My question to you isn’t whether you really are stuck or in a bad frame of mind. It’s about what you’re going to do to fix it. For myself, I’ve found just having an outlet is sufficient to get something to stop bugging me. A few good friends don’t mind the litany, and provide just enough of their own experiences so I don’t feel alone. Once we’re done figuring out my shit and their shit, we move on. From those points, we talk about everything from delicious Chocolate Chip Pancakes at iHop, or how to make the lowest carb cheesecake, and my personal favorite: what books we’re reading. (OK the cheesecake is also a favorite. Mmmm…I still think there should be a Cheesecake Frappucino, Freda, and I’m NOT pregnant :P)
Yesterday I blogged about Introspection. Looking inward, finding things out about yourself that you probably don’t want to know and will most likely never remember (unless you have a nifty blog). While I don’t recommend living your life constantly watching yourself like that, it’s a valuable tool for those times when nothing else seems to be working for you. Your cat won’t use the litter box and all the advice they gave you at PetSmart just doesn’t work on your cat. You have a weird cat. For all you know, your cat is a Drogo. Looking inwardly, finding it within yourself to admit that perhaps you should stop leaving your poprocks in her litterbox, you’ll discover you had the answer all along.
Life is never that simple, of course. We’re complex creatures with enormous capacity for everything we set our minds to. Blaming things we claim are out of our control allows us to get away with being half of what we want to be. Maybe it’s laziness; I’m sure lazy! I’d rather eat cheesecake than figure out why I keep plucking my eyebrows when the stupid eyebrows just keep growing back. Hell, I’d rather eat cheesecake than pluck my eyebrows. Mmmm….cheesecake….
So since we’re such complex creatures, we’ve all got our coping mechanisms, internal stream of conscious, SUBconscious, etc. I’ve got a very personal relationship with Karma. Karma and I go way way back. I think we met when I got put on timeout after biting someone back in Preschool, although it could’ve been when I kept throwing that toy to make Mom pick it up for me again and she finally just stuck me in my crib for naptime (I HATE NAPTIME! WAAH WAAAH SN…nnn..oooooore). Whenever it was she seems to remember my transgressions better than I do. I’ll be walking along, innocent as can be, and WHACK! I hit my knee on a f)(&)()ng arm chair. ARM CHAIR. That was to make up for accidentally elbowing that guy on my way back from lunch, but oooow!! That hurt!
Some people believe you will receive 3x the harm back to you that you’ve done to others. Honestly, that seems a bit harsh, especially if you aren’t intentionally hurting someone. Going out of your way to do someone harm would definitely warrant that sort of reciprocation, but for accidental elbow-jabbing? I think tit-for-tat is fair in that case. Strangely enough, Karma agrees. Wait WHAT?? Karma AGREES? Preposterous!
In fact, it isn’t preposterous at all. It’s something I fully believe, and as a result, my internal deity agrees. When you believe something completely, you subconsciously set yourself up for what you believe you deserve. Because of this, we tend to have something in the back of our minds that we’ve named that will mete out those small justices. Mine is Karma, of course. Some people have Lady Luck or Fate, some people feel they should blame God. Perhaps blame is too strong a word, though. What I mean is they are responsible for ensuring the behavior we’ve been raised with. As someone raised in a very strict Christian environment, I’ve always believed we get what we deserve, so we should do unto others as we have had done..oh wait no, that’s the other one. We should do unto others as we would have them do to us. It’s a very simple statement that covers a lot of territory. If you send out positive signals to the universe (think happy thoughts), happy things will come to you. In essence, if you walk around smiling, people won’t treat you like dirt. What is your reaction to someone you see who is smiling, whistling, singing, or exhibiting signs of happiness? Mine’s usually a giggle or grin. When I’m really down and out it might get a sad smile, but it’d still improve my mood! Because we’re all linked through language, body or verbal, we as individuals can change the world with a simple smile. When you’re not feeling so happy though, try not to smile — it looks more like a grimace. The best advice for those who’re not-so-happy is to go “Introspective” on yourself and have a chat with your internal deity. You’ll find the rest of your day is a little different. I was a lot more self-aware, but also much more aware of things going on around me. It was extremely daunting to understand more about the reasons behind things (sort-of like how I imagine a person who’s just gotten out of Psych 101 for the day might feel). I had trouble assimilating, so to speak. I did find myself being far more understanding and reacting with a more positive bent though, which did a ton to rack up the good Karma points. Since the experience was such an “eye opener” for me, I wanted to share it with all of you.
Don’t worry! I’m not always such a pretendullectual drag 😉 On a less-intense note, my son absolutely loves tomatoes. His favorite form is actual real live tomatoes. He’ll eat a hamburger, no ketchup, tomatoes only. We aren’t sure if he’s a changeling or not though, since he isn’t all that fond of cheese. In my family, dislike of cheese gets you kicked out. Thankfully my son does like “Pizza Cheese,” so as long as it has been shipped on Pizza before, he’ll eat it.
Wonder what tomorrow’s blog should be about? Maybe this fun new game I’ve been playing…